I've been thinking for a while about how to end this blog, and I can't think of an appropriate way to conclude a discussion on everything that aging and spirituality encompass. As I was talking to my dad about spirituality, he said that as he gets older he doesn't worry so much about what he has done wrong in his but more about the opportunities he had to do good, to help someone in need and did not do it.
Maybe that's all spirituality is, doing the right thing in the end and the guiding forces that lead us to determine what the right thing (for us) is. It is also in this sense that spirituality leads us in making decisions and choices for our lives. As people get older and enter the stages of generativity vs stagnation and integrity vs despair they tend to rely more on their spirituality in their desire to pass on experience, knowledge and wisdom as well as in their decision making.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Religion and Spirituality...again
Well, I finally got the courage, or shall we say stamina, to ask my dad about his definition of spirituality. I told him I had been writing a lot about him in my blog on spirituality and older adults. So, before I begin, I have to say - his answer really surprised me.
My dad's definition of spirituality is - simply - one's belief in a divine being. Oh my god. How was it that simple? I was prepared for an hour of discussing spirituality, and he gave me possibly the simplest answer that covers almost everything associated with spirituality: morals, values, ethics, beliefs, because if one believes in a divine being then it guides one's life in these ways. hmmm....and, even more surprising, considering how religious I consider both of my parents to be, is that my Dad did not even think religion was related to spirituality other than as a place to express one's spirituality.
Now, I don't think this definition is true for all older adults, I think my Dad has a whole lot of Catholicism behind that simple statement, but I think it highlights the idea that sometimes the simplest idea or definition is the one to go with. While this is different for everyone, just as spirituality is, it is a guiding force in one's life.
My dad's definition of spirituality is - simply - one's belief in a divine being. Oh my god. How was it that simple? I was prepared for an hour of discussing spirituality, and he gave me possibly the simplest answer that covers almost everything associated with spirituality: morals, values, ethics, beliefs, because if one believes in a divine being then it guides one's life in these ways. hmmm....and, even more surprising, considering how religious I consider both of my parents to be, is that my Dad did not even think religion was related to spirituality other than as a place to express one's spirituality.
Now, I don't think this definition is true for all older adults, I think my Dad has a whole lot of Catholicism behind that simple statement, but I think it highlights the idea that sometimes the simplest idea or definition is the one to go with. While this is different for everyone, just as spirituality is, it is a guiding force in one's life.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Decisions
Yesterday's election seems to be all anyone could talk about for weeks, months almost a year heading into it. With all of the campaigning going on it was hard to focus on anything else. Many people base their vote on their spiritual or religious preferences and who they feel is the morally "right" candidate.
My mom told I wasn't allowed to vote if I was voting for Obama. My friend's mom refused to take her to turn in her absentee ballot so she had to get her dad to take her - when she came back her mom told her she was going to confession. I think these are humourous instances and I don't think either of our parents were for real serious; just trying to "lead" or "guide" us in the right direction as parents tend to do.
I was surprised my dad didn't use the religious or spiritual argument to try to sway my vote as the rest of my family did.
After these instances, I started thinking about how much people use their spiritual and/or religious beliefs to help them make decisions - from small everyday decisions to bigger once in a lifetime decisions. It seems to me that older adults may have fewer decisions, but they seem to be of greater magnitude. It is in this sense, I think, that older adults rely much more on their spirituality and/or religious beliefs to be their compass, their guiding force.
My mom told I wasn't allowed to vote if I was voting for Obama. My friend's mom refused to take her to turn in her absentee ballot so she had to get her dad to take her - when she came back her mom told her she was going to confession. I think these are humourous instances and I don't think either of our parents were for real serious; just trying to "lead" or "guide" us in the right direction as parents tend to do.
I was surprised my dad didn't use the religious or spiritual argument to try to sway my vote as the rest of my family did.
After these instances, I started thinking about how much people use their spiritual and/or religious beliefs to help them make decisions - from small everyday decisions to bigger once in a lifetime decisions. It seems to me that older adults may have fewer decisions, but they seem to be of greater magnitude. It is in this sense, I think, that older adults rely much more on their spirituality and/or religious beliefs to be their compass, their guiding force.
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